I’ve been pondering over two “easter figures” lately: Mary Magdalene and Thomas. In the resurrection narratives of St. John, these two received close-ups: Mary in Jn 20:11-18 and Thomas in Jn 20:26-29. They both wanted to see and touch the dead and risen Jesus!
Actually, Mary was looking for the dead Jesus. This is important as this is a proof that Jesus really died. Indeed she was there when it happened and she knew exactly where he was buried. She wasn’t expecting the resurrection at all, was she? All she had was terrible grief and pain, now doubled by the fear that she also lost the chance of finding Jesus’ body, the last remains of her beloved Master!
Thomas, on the other hand, was told by the other disciples that the Lord was risen and that they had seen him. But he wasn’t convinced! He too had doubts about the resurrection: the Master was dead and that was it! He even issued his challenge: it wouldn’t be enough for him to see Jesus alive as the others say, but to be sure that it was really him, he would need to see the mark of the nails and touch his wounds!
The way I see it, the Risen Lord took these two in their own terms. To Mary, who was overwhelmed by grief, he appeared gradually. He “waited” as it were, till Mary could “gather her senses” and be in a condition to recognize him. In fact, a simple appearance accompanied by consoling words (“woman, why are you weeping, whom do you seek?”) was not enough. Mary just mistook him for the gardener. He had to call her by name (the Shepherd calls his own by name)! It is the name – the loving knowledge of the person - that awakens the heart to recognition! That was “it” for Mary. No need to examine if it was really Jesus, with wounds and all. The wisdom of the heart is all that matters. Her reaction was instinctive – to embrace her Master! I’d like to imagine that the Lord gave her time to do this too, but not much, since there were more important things to do: the risen Master had to be on his way and Mary had to run and tell the news to the other disciples. Hence, Jesus’ words: “Enough, Mary! But go to my brothers and say to them, “I am ascending to my Father and your Father, to my God and your God.” We are now in a new “order of things” – the new Covenant has been fulfilled: my Father is your Father, my God is your God – we are one Family, one People!
Actually, Mary was looking for the dead Jesus. This is important as this is a proof that Jesus really died. Indeed she was there when it happened and she knew exactly where he was buried. She wasn’t expecting the resurrection at all, was she? All she had was terrible grief and pain, now doubled by the fear that she also lost the chance of finding Jesus’ body, the last remains of her beloved Master!
Thomas, on the other hand, was told by the other disciples that the Lord was risen and that they had seen him. But he wasn’t convinced! He too had doubts about the resurrection: the Master was dead and that was it! He even issued his challenge: it wouldn’t be enough for him to see Jesus alive as the others say, but to be sure that it was really him, he would need to see the mark of the nails and touch his wounds!
The way I see it, the Risen Lord took these two in their own terms. To Mary, who was overwhelmed by grief, he appeared gradually. He “waited” as it were, till Mary could “gather her senses” and be in a condition to recognize him. In fact, a simple appearance accompanied by consoling words (“woman, why are you weeping, whom do you seek?”) was not enough. Mary just mistook him for the gardener. He had to call her by name (the Shepherd calls his own by name)! It is the name – the loving knowledge of the person - that awakens the heart to recognition! That was “it” for Mary. No need to examine if it was really Jesus, with wounds and all. The wisdom of the heart is all that matters. Her reaction was instinctive – to embrace her Master! I’d like to imagine that the Lord gave her time to do this too, but not much, since there were more important things to do: the risen Master had to be on his way and Mary had to run and tell the news to the other disciples. Hence, Jesus’ words: “Enough, Mary! But go to my brothers and say to them, “I am ascending to my Father and your Father, to my God and your God.” We are now in a new “order of things” – the new Covenant has been fulfilled: my Father is your Father, my God is your God – we are one Family, one People!
With Thomas, the Lord was more conceding. Thomas needed to overcome his doubt by touching... Hence the Lord personally invited him: “Come, Thomas, put your finger here and see my hands. Reach out your hand and put it in my side. Do not doubt but believe.” Thomas’ response becomes a famous confession of faith: “My Lord and my God!” Actually this Gospel episode was later revealed as a blessing for us. Scholars say that here, Thomas received confirmation and was cured of his doubt but he was at the same time “robbed” of the greater beatitude. True, he was blessed because he saw the Risen Lord but “more blessed are those who have not seen and yet have come to believe.”
When I think of how the Lord takes us “as we are and where we are,” I always remember my own Father’s faith struggle. He was a real God-searcher even if he didn’t say anything to us his children. I perceived it in the radio programs that he listened to; he enjoyed religious debates. He even welcomed “missionaries” who passed by our place – Mormons, Adventists, Iglesia ni Kristo, etc. – and gladly accepted the literatures they offer. So we have a “collection of Bibles” at home. All this search was, however, only in the head level. He was undecided. He wanted to see “proofs,” just like Thomas! He was baptised Catholic but non practicing. I observed that he went to Mass only twice a year – his birthday and the Feast of our Patron Saint; yes, not even Christmas nor Easter!
When I entered the convent, however, he was hit hard! I remember that when I tried to explain to him how special was the religious vocation, he reacted angrily and went away. I pursued him and found him crying silently. He had great ambitions for me as I had for myself, but I was convinced that it was God’s plan that mattered. First, I had to find what that was and all the rest could come later. That conviction gave me the courage to leave my Father and my family.
I realize now that my act of filial “disobedience” also became the proof of God’s power in my Father’s life. Later on, when he came to accept my vocation, he admitted that he was happy about my decision. He came to understand what my vocation meant: he said, “when I think of you, I remember God!” And that’s it – the Risen Lord used me to announce to my Father that God is really ALIVE and is operating in our lives!
When I think of how the Lord takes us “as we are and where we are,” I always remember my own Father’s faith struggle. He was a real God-searcher even if he didn’t say anything to us his children. I perceived it in the radio programs that he listened to; he enjoyed religious debates. He even welcomed “missionaries” who passed by our place – Mormons, Adventists, Iglesia ni Kristo, etc. – and gladly accepted the literatures they offer. So we have a “collection of Bibles” at home. All this search was, however, only in the head level. He was undecided. He wanted to see “proofs,” just like Thomas! He was baptised Catholic but non practicing. I observed that he went to Mass only twice a year – his birthday and the Feast of our Patron Saint; yes, not even Christmas nor Easter!
When I entered the convent, however, he was hit hard! I remember that when I tried to explain to him how special was the religious vocation, he reacted angrily and went away. I pursued him and found him crying silently. He had great ambitions for me as I had for myself, but I was convinced that it was God’s plan that mattered. First, I had to find what that was and all the rest could come later. That conviction gave me the courage to leave my Father and my family.
I realize now that my act of filial “disobedience” also became the proof of God’s power in my Father’s life. Later on, when he came to accept my vocation, he admitted that he was happy about my decision. He came to understand what my vocation meant: he said, “when I think of you, I remember God!” And that’s it – the Risen Lord used me to announce to my Father that God is really ALIVE and is operating in our lives!
